Break Through

I had a break through this weekend and it was perfect.

This last Thursday I drove up the juniors and seniors to Pine Springs Ranch for Bible Camp. I was very reluctant to go at first but little did I know what God had planned for me there.
The first day we just went to one meeting and then had a staff meeting after. There the head pastor told us how our ministry this weekend would be our presence with the kids. By them seeing us at the meetings, it would show them that we care and wanted it to be a great experience. I didn't think twice about it, because of course I was going to be where the kids are, it's my favorite place. What happened on Friday night I never expected.

Friday night rolled around and after a long day of team building activities we had our evening meeting. I was standing among the kids, singing songs, when I noticed one of my students walk by and I just reached out and touched her. When I touched her she turned and hugged my legs (I was standing on a chair). She just stood there for a couple seconds before I asked, "Are you okay, do you need to talk?". She just shook her head 'yes' and off we went.
We went up the stairs to the top floor and sat on the top step. There she started telling me how frustrated she was getting because she was a student leader and wanted this weekend to be perfect and so uplifting for her family group, but there were students there that didn't want to be there. And how she really felt the devil was telling her she wasn't good enough to be a leader, and she was struggling with her boyfriend who didn't have a relationship with God. I told her everything I could, but mostly just listened, because I don't always know what to say. She poured her heart out to me and then I walked her back to her room and we sat down on her bed and I asked her if I could pray for her. It was apparently just what she wanted and I wrapped her in my arms and hugged her the whole time I prayed for her. As I was praying I found a tear running down my face. This was my first big, personal, spiritual experience with a student.

We didn't necessarily come to a conclusion to all her problems, but it was what both of needed at that moment. Often I have felt that I haven't had much of an impact on students in a spiritual sense. I give chapels every month and help out with campus ministries every time I get the chance, but it's hard to see the outcome of those things. This was a real experience and I have been praying that I would have one of those with a student this year. I felt like I could pack my bags and go home after that, although I never would, because I know God is going to use me even more here. The feeling that I got from sharing my experience with God and giving it to someone else is something that can never be replaced and that is what I want to do the rest of my life.

God is so good and continues to surprise me all the time. This year has had it's bumps in the road, but nothing can be so bad that this moment is covered. We have a God that loves us so much and wants us to succeed and I can't wait for that chance to share it with another student.

My future is The World Race?

God has impressed me to be so much more than I am. To reach out to others in ways I never thought I would be able to do. I want nothing more than to be used as His hands and His feet. He as shown me The World Race and I think it will be my next big adventure in life. Even though it maybe 2 years away, I am excited about it now. I can't stop thinking about it and reading other people's blogs about their experiences. It's unbelieveable!

You should all check it out :) www.theworldrace.org

Half of my Heart

I have always heard people talk about how their heart was in two different places. I never understood what that was like until now.

Half of my heart is in Nebraska and the other half has been swept off its feet and landed in California.
I never expected this to happen, but the nearness that I have felt to God, the relationships I have built, the hard times I have made it through, the new adventures I have experienced, and all the growing up I have done have completely changed my life.

The first couple months in California were a nightmare. I wasn't used to the big city with so much traffic (SO much). Things are very different here compared to where I have grown up my whole life and as mush as I hate to say it, I have fallen completely and utterly in love with California.

For some it would be the sunshine, for others it would be the ocean, but for me, it's where I have truly found God and myself. I feel like God has opened my eyes and my heart to what He desires most to do through me. I want to serve others for the rest of my life. I want to give my all to other people and love them like they have never been loved before. I felt like I have always had this desire but California has opened me up to the leaps and bounds that I am now willing to take to completely devote my life to the Lover of my Soul.

Part of me is sad because I couldn't find that in Lincoln, but I think what I needed was to leave my comfort zone of 21 years and come experience something that only God could pull me through. Although I have learned so much about God through everything Lincoln has done for me the other half (or more) I have been taught through California.

With that said, half of my heart will always belong to California and the other to Nebraska, but that split is exactly what I needed.

It WILL Change My Life.

The school I am task forcing at has given me a decision and what I decide will change my life forever.

Newbury Park has offered me a teaching/deaning position. I haven't graduated. I didn't ask for it. I didn't even know it was an option. They are even talking about helping me financially to finish my degree while working there. Now the decision is resting in God's hands.

PLEASE pray for this HUGE decision in my life.

Written on my mirror

I have this written on my mirror. I wake up and I see it every morning.

Smile because you can, because you are loved, because you are blessed, because you are beautiful, because someone else NEEDS it.
-Courtney Gutknecht

As you go though out your day remember to smile because you can. Not everyone has that privilege. Smile because you are loved by God, so many people, and me. Smile because you are blessed in more ways than you can see or count. Smile because you are more beautiful then you will ever know. And smile because there is someone who will need a smile today, they need that encouragement.

:)